In less than 12 hours I'll be loading boxes into a U-Haul and moving. Again. You'd think by the number of times I've moved, I'd be pretty good at it. Not so much. It's funny, because as a kid, I had only moved once. Then in 6th grade I moved. And I've moved nearly every year since. 4 moves in 5 years (not counting living with various people for a few weeks at a time).
I've been here for two years, and I finally feel at home. I finally remember which cupboard has the plates in it versus the cups. I've finally broken into a routine, and I can walk around the entire house in the dark with ease. I don't want to leave. I like my home. I'm doing well here.
I don't want to go live with these new people. Strangers. I couldn't even tell you their last names. I don't know the dog's names. I don't know who they are or what they're like. It's not my house. Every little peice of me is screaming out against this. But there's nothing I can do about it. I can't deal with change.
My shelves lie naked, the contents crammed into boxes scattered around the floor (incase I needed one more reason to not want to move: tripping over boxes). My stress level is through the roof. I'm not sleeping, and when I do, it's fitful with nightmares. I feel sick to my stomach and have a constant headache. I'm cranky, hypersensitive, exhausted, and could cry at the drop of a hat.
My dad tells me to suck it up. He says moving isn't stressful. He's also the same man who's snapping at nothing and who doesn't even have half of his stuff packed up yet. But he's at his girlfriend's house hanging out instead. The thought of her makes me angry. Very angry. I can't handle this. I wish I could sleep, but my body won't let me. I wish my best friend was around, but she's not. Deep breaths.
My new goal: To stay in the same house for 3 years before I'm 30.
Two more years. And I'm done.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
In case anybody was confused...
1. Please do not keep your high beams on when you're driving behind somebody in the dark.
2. There is no reason to tailgate while you're going 70+ on 95. Really.
3. Actually, just don't tailgate at all. And don't get all in a huff if the car in front of you isn't doing 10 over.
4. You are very wrong if you're doing 20 under the speed limit.
5. I can't help it if I hit you because you're a bike that decides to not have reflectors are ride in the street in the dark.
6. Can you please move over when there's a train of cars trying to merge? I know it's not your responsibility, but come on now.
7. Yes, blinkers may be a "courtesy" in Florida, but let's be "courteous".
8. People die from drunk driving. So you may think you're cool when you talk really loud about being wasted one night, and thinking it's funny how hard it was to drive, but you won't be laughing when you're in court for manslaughter.
9. There's 14 stoplights between my house and my school. When you hit one, you hit them all. And it always happens to be when you're in a rush.
10. If you're jamming out in your car, and you notice I'm watching, there's no recovering from that by trying to act like you were fixing your hair the whole time. Haha.
Just thought I'd get that cleared up...
2. There is no reason to tailgate while you're going 70+ on 95. Really.
3. Actually, just don't tailgate at all. And don't get all in a huff if the car in front of you isn't doing 10 over.
4. You are very wrong if you're doing 20 under the speed limit.
5. I can't help it if I hit you because you're a bike that decides to not have reflectors are ride in the street in the dark.
6. Can you please move over when there's a train of cars trying to merge? I know it's not your responsibility, but come on now.
7. Yes, blinkers may be a "courtesy" in Florida, but let's be "courteous".
8. People die from drunk driving. So you may think you're cool when you talk really loud about being wasted one night, and thinking it's funny how hard it was to drive, but you won't be laughing when you're in court for manslaughter.
9. There's 14 stoplights between my house and my school. When you hit one, you hit them all. And it always happens to be when you're in a rush.
10. If you're jamming out in your car, and you notice I'm watching, there's no recovering from that by trying to act like you were fixing your hair the whole time. Haha.
Just thought I'd get that cleared up...
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Study break
So I'm taking a study break (is it a bad sign if it's not even 9am on a Saturday morning and you already ened a study break?) and I've compiled a few fun lists...
Top 15 things that shouldn't exist (in no particular order):
15. Waking up before the sun has risen
14. Having to pay to take of a Saturday morning to take a test you don't really want to take (aka SAT)
13. The fact that Josephine / 10th Street is pretty straight, yet the speed limit changes all on the same street from 35, to 45, to 30, to 40
12. Store employees standing around talking while the check out lines are 8 carts deep
11. Getting all excited about coupons only to find out that it's actually expired after you put the items in you cart
10. That really awkward feeling when there's only one seat open between two strangers, or you're in the elevator, or you think you know somebody but you're not sure or you forget their name... We could go on all night
9. Forgetting everything as soon as you get the test.
8. Forgetting everything as soon as you get the test when you didn't sleep so you could study.
7. Kids throwing fits over nonsense.
6. Those days when you're soaked with sweat and humidity just walking out to your car... and then the AC doesn't work.
5. Morning alarms.
4. Morning alarms when you're warm and comfy in your bed in the winter, and you can feel the cold air starting to rush in already.
3. Being super excited to go home and eat a certain food, only to find that somebody already ate it.
2. Getting a stain on / growing out of / ruining in the wash your favorite shirt.
1. Obnoxious songs stuck in your head... This land is your land, this land is my land, from the New York islands...
15 Best Simple Things Ever
15. That cool, foggy, dewy feeling in the morning right after the sun has come up
14. Watching a baby sleep
13. Actually getting a baby to sleep
12. Waking up feeling totally refreshed
11. Finding a note of encouragement somebody left you in a book they returned
10. A new CD and playing it over and over and over and over again.
9. Finding an old favorite CD you haven't listened to in forever
8. Going through memory boxes
7. An afternoon nap after a long day
6. Lazy Sunday afternoons
5. Ghiradelli chocolate...
4. Actually, any kind of chocolate
3. Waking up in the morning and having nothing on your agenda
2. Walking on the beach when the sun is rising or setting
1. Watching things turn white right before your eyes while cleaning it.
Top 15 things that shouldn't exist (in no particular order):
15. Waking up before the sun has risen
14. Having to pay to take of a Saturday morning to take a test you don't really want to take (aka SAT)
13. The fact that Josephine / 10th Street is pretty straight, yet the speed limit changes all on the same street from 35, to 45, to 30, to 40
12. Store employees standing around talking while the check out lines are 8 carts deep
11. Getting all excited about coupons only to find out that it's actually expired after you put the items in you cart
10. That really awkward feeling when there's only one seat open between two strangers, or you're in the elevator, or you think you know somebody but you're not sure or you forget their name... We could go on all night
9. Forgetting everything as soon as you get the test.
8. Forgetting everything as soon as you get the test when you didn't sleep so you could study.
7. Kids throwing fits over nonsense.
6. Those days when you're soaked with sweat and humidity just walking out to your car... and then the AC doesn't work.
5. Morning alarms.
4. Morning alarms when you're warm and comfy in your bed in the winter, and you can feel the cold air starting to rush in already.
3. Being super excited to go home and eat a certain food, only to find that somebody already ate it.
2. Getting a stain on / growing out of / ruining in the wash your favorite shirt.
1. Obnoxious songs stuck in your head... This land is your land, this land is my land, from the New York islands...
15 Best Simple Things Ever
15. That cool, foggy, dewy feeling in the morning right after the sun has come up
14. Watching a baby sleep
13. Actually getting a baby to sleep
12. Waking up feeling totally refreshed
11. Finding a note of encouragement somebody left you in a book they returned
10. A new CD and playing it over and over and over and over again.
9. Finding an old favorite CD you haven't listened to in forever
8. Going through memory boxes
7. An afternoon nap after a long day
6. Lazy Sunday afternoons
5. Ghiradelli chocolate...
4. Actually, any kind of chocolate
3. Waking up in the morning and having nothing on your agenda
2. Walking on the beach when the sun is rising or setting
1. Watching things turn white right before your eyes while cleaning it.
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