The million dollar diploma

I like a good sale.

Like the fuchsia cardigan I got at Old Navy for $3.86.

Or my Nikes I got at the outlet mall for $30.

Or the brown and cream eyelet sun dress for $12.

Or the jeans I'm wearing for $15.

I could go on and on. Rarely do I buy anything full price. Actually, I have been pretty blessed lately to not have to buy a whole lot of clothes in the last six months.

I love when friends clean out their closets.

Like 90% of the jeans I own.

A handful of shirts and blouses.

A couple pairs of shoes.

A few jackets.

A dress and some bags.

I don't take offense to hand-me-downs; in fact, I get quite excited that you were thinking of me.

What I am offended by is the lack of funding that schools are willing to present their students with. I refuse to buy a college education at full price. Hear me, admissions offices: it does not cost you $37,000 to house and teach me for a year. Not even close. I am not worth a measly $10,000. I am worth considerably more than that. I will present myself in a way that you will be honored to have me on your campus. With pride aside, this is a business. I would not buy a car for the sticker price, the same as I will not pay the tuition stated on the eleventy-billionth postcard you have sent me.

I will search high and low, scouring malls and overstock stores (love love Marshall's!) to find the perfectly priced sun dress. I will do the same with my tuition. I will go to college, debt-free. I will sit on the phone for hours, I will create some tears, I will threaten to take my business elsewhere. Where there is money to be had, I will get it. Yes, I will write essays on Chinese immigration, fire sprinklers, and the importance of real estate agents in the community. I will harass my teachers for letters of recommendation and keep the mailman busy. You see, this application process is the easiest way to get money. Say I apply for four scholarships that take an hour each and receive one worth $100. That means I have just made $25 an hour... That is considerably more than I would make working at Chick fil a.

Either way, I am going to college and I am getting a degree.